Wow, I found it! A word that defines how I feel. And I never thought I was like ANYONE else in feeling it. But yeah, that is it. SAUDADE!
Anyways, nowadays I have been working on a new restaurant in the far west part of the state I live in. So it is like a two hour drive from where I am now. Which means, I will be moving if I get the place. It is for sale, so me getting it, will be contingent on the Seller accepting my offer, or us coming to terms on a price, and also on my getting financing from a bank for the property. Everything else seems trivial and not really a block to me getting it, it is just those two things, the price, and the financing. I hope that will go well.
I drove there this past Friday, and I walked up on it and it was SOOOOO cute! Just looking from the outside, it was adorable from the little town it was in to the bench outside to the idea I saw it with little patio tables outside with mosaic tiles and planters, and then the Realtor came and let me in, and I saw how wonderful it was set up and how much I saw myself behind the counter, and smiled as I saw the simplicity. It had recently been open. So now I looked around and asked myself if I could do it. Could I actually live in a small town again. It seemed almost like a Pleasantville town in technicolor.
But the good part was that it is still only two hours away from the city, and it was really inexpensive to buy the place! So I went back to the realty office, and talked with the Realtor. She called the Seller and we talked a bit, about some concerns I had about what equipment and fixtures would be staying and when it would be able to be emptied to take possession. And I wrote up an offer before I left.
Then I drove over to the apartment complex I had found online, and I found the cutest little one bedroom apartment there with a garage! And although I couldn't have a dog (I love dogs), I could have a cat. But it was just the perfect size for someone who would be working from open to close and just needed a simple place to sleep in. It would be home for at least the first year or two. Beyond that, I would hope to be able to afford a house there, since they are also moderately priced.
So now the Seller has made a counteroffer to me, and I replied with my own counteroffer. So this afternoon, I am going to go back there to check out some plumbing and electrical systems with my brother, since he will be out there doing some work with my other brother's shop in the town next to where I will be.
This is my last attempt to do something on my own. If this one doesn't pan out, I will just assume that this isn't my time. All I can hope for is that one simple phrase, those two words in Hebrew, Jehovah Jireh - "The Lord Provides!" If it's meant to be, it will happen, and if it doesn't, it won't. Financing seems to be the only block now, and I hope that will prove to be non-existent as well. If all goes well, I will be taking possession on August 1, 2009. And I will be open by Labor Day weekend (the first weekend in September). Today, I am just happy for the opportunity to dream. "Only in dreams can a man be truly free. Twas always thus, and always thus will be." John Keating Dead Poet's Society.
I probably would have made a LOT more money doing the same thing here in Chicago, but in the end, I don't think I would have been as happy if I had to deal with the issues I had with the landlord. It was a lot of unintended stress that I didn't need to deal with. Here I will be in a smaller town. But not a ghost town. It is actually quite quaint. Although the one thing I see as a potential problem is that the place I am moving to with a population of approximately 25,000 has about 60 churches in it. This means to me that the town is pretty religious. I am quite spiritual, but not at all religious anymore. For Christ Sake, they have laws on the books prohibiting the possession of pornographic materials. What, there is no internet in this town???
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